long post
I’m growing up. You don’t realize change until it’s over. It creeps up behind you and takes you unawares. And today I’ve come to the astonishing and discomfiting conclusion that I’ve grown up. Not that I’m exactly more mature. I don’t think I am. But that somehow, in the past few months, I’ve lost the last remnants of my childhood.
Sigh. I really really don’t know how that happened. Those days when I was small and carefree are so distant and hazy. I really can’t possibly imagine myself like that anymore=( And all those precious memories of the past… I think I’ve almost lost them all! You know Bastian from the Neverending Story? (I remember loving that show when I was a kid.. though I don’t remember much about it now…) He loses his memories and in doing so, becomes a new person. Maybe that’s why we lose our memories (just occurred to me..)? Cuz if your memories constitutes who you are, you can’t change and at the same time still be the same person with the same memories…
=( I was actually feeling very poignant/piquant/sentimental (I can’t find the right word), but I don’t think I did a good job in conveying my sense of loss.. haha. Aiyahhh. I don’t wanna grow up. Ok. Maybe I wouldn’t mind being grown up (I don’t know), but I certainly don’t take much pleasure in growing up. Actually, right… I think growing up is more of losing something than gaining something (just occurred to me also). Like the for the mosquitoes (darn you mosquito! Haha), it loses its larval organs and sheds its exoskeleton before as it undergoes metamorphosis, right? Yeah and the tadpole with its tail, etc. But the thing is, when you gain something slowly, when you finally have it, you feel as if it had always been there. But if you lose something slowly and then look back at the times when you had it, you realize your loss. Haha am I being incoherent?
Sigh (good sigh) it’s a lazy Sat afternoon and I like lazy Sat afternoons=) I think I’m pretty random. But since I’m on the topic of memories and stuff, I was in the toilet the other day (in camp), and I smelt my friend cooking noodles in the toilet (don’t ask) and I suddenly thought of those days of holidays with my parents where we would always bring instant noodles along with us and cook them for breakfast cuz we were lazy. Haha. I don’t know.. is it just me who finds smells so evocative? There’s a word for it I think.. Redolent, yes that’s it. Apparently someone must have coined that word cuz he feels the way I do. Haha. One day I think I’ll set up a perfume shop and bottle up memories.
Ok. I think I’m going to lie in bed now and read. Or watch the Nightmare Before Christmas! Haha I finally bought the DVD although it’s not the special edition one (you can’t get it in Singapore)… Tim Burton’s brillant. If you haven’t watched this, go to youtube and search for Tim Burton and watch ‘Vincent’. Haha. Then you’ll agree that he’s brillant. I tried to contact him to persuade him to do a remake of The Neverending Story (haha I just read the book which is so-so but very Tim Burton-ish) but apparently he’s uncontactable. Oh well.Anyway, do you guys want to meet up for Christmas for a dinner or something? When will the overseas ppl be in Singapore? Come back alright? Haha. Ok, ok. I think this has been a very long post (I’m making up for you, Daryl!) and so I should end soon. Well, to all those taking exams all the best! The Best is Yet to Be! Haha.
Sigh. I really really don’t know how that happened. Those days when I was small and carefree are so distant and hazy. I really can’t possibly imagine myself like that anymore=( And all those precious memories of the past… I think I’ve almost lost them all! You know Bastian from the Neverending Story? (I remember loving that show when I was a kid.. though I don’t remember much about it now…) He loses his memories and in doing so, becomes a new person. Maybe that’s why we lose our memories (just occurred to me..)? Cuz if your memories constitutes who you are, you can’t change and at the same time still be the same person with the same memories…
=( I was actually feeling very poignant/piquant/sentimental (I can’t find the right word), but I don’t think I did a good job in conveying my sense of loss.. haha. Aiyahhh. I don’t wanna grow up. Ok. Maybe I wouldn’t mind being grown up (I don’t know), but I certainly don’t take much pleasure in growing up. Actually, right… I think growing up is more of losing something than gaining something (just occurred to me also). Like the for the mosquitoes (darn you mosquito! Haha), it loses its larval organs and sheds its exoskeleton before as it undergoes metamorphosis, right? Yeah and the tadpole with its tail, etc. But the thing is, when you gain something slowly, when you finally have it, you feel as if it had always been there. But if you lose something slowly and then look back at the times when you had it, you realize your loss. Haha am I being incoherent?
Sigh (good sigh) it’s a lazy Sat afternoon and I like lazy Sat afternoons=) I think I’m pretty random. But since I’m on the topic of memories and stuff, I was in the toilet the other day (in camp), and I smelt my friend cooking noodles in the toilet (don’t ask) and I suddenly thought of those days of holidays with my parents where we would always bring instant noodles along with us and cook them for breakfast cuz we were lazy. Haha. I don’t know.. is it just me who finds smells so evocative? There’s a word for it I think.. Redolent, yes that’s it. Apparently someone must have coined that word cuz he feels the way I do. Haha. One day I think I’ll set up a perfume shop and bottle up memories.
Ok. I think I’m going to lie in bed now and read. Or watch the Nightmare Before Christmas! Haha I finally bought the DVD although it’s not the special edition one (you can’t get it in Singapore)… Tim Burton’s brillant. If you haven’t watched this, go to youtube and search for Tim Burton and watch ‘Vincent’. Haha. Then you’ll agree that he’s brillant. I tried to contact him to persuade him to do a remake of The Neverending Story (haha I just read the book which is so-so but very Tim Burton-ish) but apparently he’s uncontactable. Oh well.Anyway, do you guys want to meet up for Christmas for a dinner or something? When will the overseas ppl be in Singapore? Come back alright? Haha. Ok, ok. I think this has been a very long post (I’m making up for you, Daryl!) and so I should end soon. Well, to all those taking exams all the best! The Best is Yet to Be! Haha.
